prayer...

For 4 years now, I have prayed with my son each night while I tucked him in. Pretty much ever since he could talk, I would ask him if he wanted to pray, after I finished. And each night, he would respond the same, "No thank you." But lately, he's said he's wanted to pray but asked for my help cause he wasn't sure what to say. So, I would encourage him to thank Jesus for the day and tell Him he loves Him. So, for several nights, I heard the same thing, (verbatim)
"Dear Jesus, thank you for this day. I love you. Amen."

Until tonight when he uttered two more sentences, but how simple- and yet how profound- they were. All on his own, he came out with the most beautiful prayer...

Dear Jesus,

Thank you God that you are alive.

and I love you very much.

and I do not like Satan.

and I do not want to listen to him.

Amen.

I smiled and kissed him goodnight and slipped out of his room thinking that perhaps I could do well to take a lesson from my son. Sometimes I get caught up in trying to think too much about finding the "right" words to pray when I want to communicate something "really important" to God. But the thing is, He already knows my heart. And, sometimes, less is more.

Thank you, son, for the reminder. Four simple sentences. But refreshingly profound.

actions speak louder than words...

If you are like me, you've heard this "saying" about a gazillion times in your life. Parents love to say this... and, as such, I heard it plenty growing up.

But, what about when your kids say it to YOU? Even without using those exact words?

Today as I snuggled with my little sweet heart, Ariana, and told her how much I loved her, I tried to get an "I love you" out of her, as well. I said, "Can you say- "I luv you? Go ahead, say I. love. you." And she looked at me with her big beautiful eyes and pursed her little lips together and instead of saying, 'I luv you" said, 'mmmmmmm whhaaa' (more or less) and gave me a big huge kiss and a smile.

My heart melted. And my mind remembered how much louder actions can speak than words alone.

A few days ago, out of the blue, Grace said to me: "Mom! I've got a GREAT question. This is really interesting!..."

I eagerly waited, my ears perking up in anticipation of this exciting question...

"How come you never laugh? It's really weird, Mom. You just never laugh. Why is that?" she pondered with as much enthusiasm as if, say, she was wondering out loud about one of the 7 wonders of the world.

Wow. So that was the big question.

My ears no longer perked, and my own enthusiasm quite deflated I retorted with furrowed brow, "what do you mean? I laugh all the time! I am a very funny person!!" grrrrrrrrrrr

We proceeded to discuss her notion that I never laugh- and I tried to defend myself. And, of course, I asked her if she thought Daddy ever laughed. When she said, "No!- he never laughs either!" I felt strangely redeemed (i.e. at least it's not all me)

Now, lest you start thinking we are a bunch of stern, mad parents and spouses let me beg you to believe me when I say we are NOT unhappy! And, despite when my daughters claim to the contrary... we DO laugh. I think we laugh a lot! Perhaps my kids have a bit of an edge over me- but, then again, they are 2, 4 and 6 and find goofy things, bodily functions and potty words hilarious- whereas I do not. So, I'll give that much to my daughter.

And though an extra loud stinky "toot" may never send me over the edge roaring in laughter (it may send me over the edge in disgust) - the truth is, I might do better to find a little more humor in everyday things. In goofy things. In things that my kids find funny.

And even if I don't find the humor, I may do well to reach inside and turn off my busy, agenda ridden mind and just smile... SMILE! It's so simple. So easy. And it speaks so much louder than words.

I have many times in recent years felt convicted over not showing my kids enough joy. I let the busy day get in the way. I forget to stop. slow down. take a moment and give them my full attention and actually listen (with my ears and my eyes) to what they are telling me.

And more often than not, I forget to laugh. OUT LOUD! I do find things funny and I do find great joy in everyday happenings, but so often I am in such a hurry to move on to the next thing on my list.

I don't want to be like that. I want to stop. Look. LISTEN...

SMILE!!!

LAUGH!!!!

That is what my kids need. That is what I need.

No words. Just actions. Small, simple, easy actions that speak VOLUMES of I love you!!

Teachable Moments...

Tonight as I was snuggling with Grace, we discussed how her ballet class (that resumed today) went. As she was telling me about it, she said she had a little disagreement with her best friend, Julia, who also happens to be in the class with her. According to Grace they had a minor disagreement about who would go first in line. Well, as she was telling me this story, the "teachable moment" light bulb went off in my head and I reminded Grace how Jesus told us that those who want to be first should go last (i.e. wisdom found in Luke 14:11), and that she should have not squabbled with her friend about going first, rather, she just should have gladly let her go before her.

To my surprise, Grace proceeded to inform me, "Mom, we don't need to listen to "God's Word" (and yes, she actually put up her 2 fingers and made the quote sign) ALL the time."

I wasn't sure whether to laugh (I mean, c'mon- the whole dramatic quote sign was pretty funny)- or, to be dismayed that somewhere along the line I failed to teach my daughter a fundamental truth that YES, actually, we do have to listen to God's Word "ALL" the time.

So, I explained to her, ya know- that core fundamental belief I have - in the Bible and trusting, relying and obeying ALL of it, ALL the time. And, lest I further aggravate my 1st born daughters inborn Type A, OCD personality, I did, of course, also make a reminder and reference to the truth of us being human (i.e. sinners!) and that we cannot be perfect, but that is where God's grace and mercy and forgiveness comes in. BUT- the point being... YES! We are told to listen to God's Word ALL the time.

But as I left her room, while I was still finding myself a little bit in shock that she actually thought we didn't need to follow the Bible all the time, I found myself in a revelation of irony of how, indeed, I have so many times in my life been convinced of that exact same false notion. It is so easy to pick and to choose and to find what suits us at any given time in our life. It is easy to make excuses and assumptions that the Bible just isn't relevant to today's "modern" society... or, at least the parts we don't want to agree with.

I found myself walking out of my 6 year old's bedroom with a powerful reminder...

God is the same yesterday. and today. and FOREVER.

And so it stands that His word is valid and true and holy and right yesterday. today. and FOREVER. God's Word is the ultimate expression of His love for us. It's His handwritten guide for me. For you! For anyone who chooses to receive and believe. What He speaks to us through His word may not always be easy to follow, but it is always- ALWAYS- meant for our good, for our protection and, most importantly, for His glory.

I am always amazed and amused how God continually uses my own parenting to teach ME lessons about Him. And I am thankful that in those teachable moments, I am not, always, just the one doing the teaching, but also the one who is taught.

who's that guy?

Some interesting conversation can always crop up completely out of the blue at our house...

Alex: Who's that guy again who dressed up in that snake costume?

Me: Hmm? Who??

Alex: You know- that bad guy?

Me: Oh- you mean, Satan?

Alex: Yeah!! Satan.

There you have it. Always have to be on my toes!

Gee, thanks... I think.

After soccer practice tonight, my little Gracie girl came running up to me and hugged me with ALL her might.

"Oh, Mommy- I love you, so, so, so much! You are the best Mommy in the whole world!"...

and just when I was reveling in that marvelous display of affection from my oldest daughter, she had to add...

"Sometimes, like today when you put Vinegar in my mouth for hitting Alex, I whisper under my breath, 'Mom's a butt' - but not now, Mommy- cause I love you so much."

Hmmm. I could have done without the admission of the "mom's a butt" thing- and although it put a bit of a damper on my feelings of elation at the hugs and declaration of love- I am glad to know that even though she occasionally thinks I'm a "butt"- she still thinks I'm the best mommy in the whole world.

Go figure.

Bucket List...

Today when I logged onto msn.com I noticed that there was a photo with the caption, "Last Lecture Professor dies of cancer..." - for whatever reason, I clicked on the link and read the brief article. I had not previously heard of this gentleman or the video of his last lecture that become a You Tube phenomenon (10 million + hits).


When I was done reading the article I felt sad... I know that it was supposed to be inspirational, but I always feel sad when I see a photo of a beautiful family and one of the members has too prematurely been taken from this earth. Though I have not seen his You Tube video- perhaps I will check it out sometime- I noticed in the article that some of the things he had talked about were things he had hoped to accomplish in his life that he had, indeed, accomplished.... "being in zero gravity, writing an article in the World Book Encyclopedia and working with the Walt Disney Co." I began to think of my own mortality and what I would "do" or say, or wish to "accomplish" if I was given 6 months to live.


As I sat in deep reflection, I at first felt like a bit of a boring person. Because as I sat and thought - the truth, I realized, was that I don't have a "bucket list" - at least not in the traditional sense of the phrase. Deep sea diving? SKY diving? Touching all seven continents? Nope. Not really. Don't get me wrong. There are definitely things I would love to do throughout my life. Most revolve around traveling and getting involved in missions. But, when it comes down to it, the only thing that matters to me- the only thing I truly wish to accomplish in this life is to serve God, the very best I can, in the calling He has placed on my life... the calling He has given me to raise my children to not only be "Christians" but to LOVE our God and Savior - to be passionate about Him and for my children to want to love, honor and serve Christ throughout their lives.



That's it. That's my "bucket list." It's not something I can "cross off" on a piece of paper, not something I can "do" in an afternoon. It's a lifetime. It's a lifestyle. And it's the only thing that matters to me. When I die.... whether it be in 6 months or 60 years - that is what I want to have accomplished more than anything. I want to leave my children a legacy of true HOPE in life everlasting.



Don't get me wrong- I love the life God has given me right now. I love being a wife, a mother, a teacher, a sister, a daughter, a friend. I am grateful beyond measure for the blessings God has heaped upon us. I pray every day that God will protect the health and safety of myself and my loved ones because while I am on this earth, I couldn't bare to go a day without my husband or my children. And, of course, I SO badly want the opportunity to raise my children.

But the truth is, when it comes down to it- the life I live on this earth really is not about LIVING life on this earth- it's about the eternal life I seek in heaven. Because the day my life on earth ends will be the day that my life TRULY BEGINS. And more than anything, I want my children and my husband with me- and all of the people that I love so dearly.

So that is my "list," my friends. The one thing I want to achieve, more than anything... children who love God and who, in turn, raise their own children to love God. And it is my daily prayer that He will help me accomplish this, that every choice I make would help, and not hinder me towards reaching that goal... for it is only through His grace, His love, His guidance, His forgiveness and His mercy that we can accomplish anything that GREAT.

the only way to "fix" things...

The background- Grace awoke last night, again, with pretty bad "growing pains" - this happens from time to time in our house, as our oldest girl is growing quite tall at a rapid pace!

The setting- The breakfast table this morning

The conversation- Grace talking to Alex about how she didn't sleep well last night because her leg hurt.

The question - Alex: "Why didn't you just fix it?"

The answer - Grace: "Because I can't fix it, Alex. Jesus is the only one who can fix things for us, who can reach down and touch our leg and make it better. He's the only one who can open the door."

The moral of the story - Even a 5 year old can remind us of simple truths... try as we might, we just can't "fix" it... Jesus is the only one who can open the door, reach down and make things right- and acknowledgement that it's only in our reliance on HIM, and not on our own abilities or actions, that we can make things "right" in any situation.

(Snuggling in bed with my 3.5 year old son)

Me: Who's your favorite mommy in the whole world??

Alex: Daddy!!

Now, I know he loves me. He really does. But he is such a Daddy's boy! He is right at that age where life is all about Dad. And in many ways, I love that. I delight in the fact that they are close and that he admires his Daddy more than anything. It is precious to watch him look up to his Dad, follow him around and want to be just like, "Daddy." Everything from wanting to grow up to be big and strong "like Dad" (the only way I can convince him to eat his vegetables) to wanting his hair to be "just like Daddy's." He is a true Daddy's boy through and through. And, even though I'm not his favorite "mommy" in the world... right now Daddy is... I wouldn't have it any other way.

Wise words from my 3 year old...

Tonight I took the kids by myself on a walk. I was pushing the baby in the stroller, Grace was riding her bike up ahead, and Alex walked next to me holding my hand. We walked along for a while, quietly, until I finally said,

"Hey buddy, what are you thinking about?"

"Ah. Just nothin'"

"Really? Nothin? C'mon-tell Mommy what you are thinking about."

"Ah. Just the color white."

"Hmm! The color white, huh? What about the color white were you thinking?"

"Just that it's not really a color at all. It's just... white. No color."

Now, at this point, I'm thinking to myself- Wow, that is really perceptive for a 3 year old. I didn't learn that until about 7th grade."

And then I proceeded to ask my little genius, "so, what made you think about that?"

"Bird poop. On the sidewalk."

Ah, but of course. Bird poop.

How to Bee cute...

My five year old daughter has had a lot on her mind lately about a certain small little something.

Something that she is both fascinated by and fearful of all at the same time.

I am not sure why this is coming up again 2 years later, but I believe it originated when my son (who was nearly 2 at the time) was stung by a bee in his eye. Apparently that made quite an impression on my daughter because nearly 2 years later, she is still talking about it. And lately- given her exploding curiosity with (what seems like) absolutely everything and how everything works, she has been quite curious about bees.

The other night, one of these curiosity Q & A's turned into massive tears, as she tried to wrap her mind around why it is that bees sting and, more importantly, how she could avoid ever getting stung. In all honesty, I am just about the worst person to ask about bees... I dislike bees very much. People always say, "Oh, just wave them away- they won't bother you." Well, those people are lying. I've tried that. Nope. I swear, it has happened more than once, a bee has smelled my "fear" from a mile away and flown directly to me, landed on my arm and just stung me out of spite. I've tried that "be cool and they'll leave you alone" and it hasn't worked. I've been known to hop out of my seat at an outdoor picnic faster than you can say, "pass the chips" and run away squealing like a little girl, at the mere site of a bee buzzing near.

BUT- of course I am not going to tell the truth to my already fearful daughter. The truth that bees really are just out to sting you. So, I perpetuated the "lie" and told her that bees are nice and they make honey and we can all just get a long with a little tolerance - you know - all that stuff.

Unconvinced and undettered, the questions continued on. More than anything, she was looking for a promise that she'd never get stung by a bee. Since I couldn't guarantee that, I tried to explain all the ways to avoid being stung. "Just be friendly," I told her. Bees only sting when they are scared and they think that you are going to hurt them."

Through her tears, she looked at me and asked, "Mom? Can I smile at the bee? Then it won't sting, right? Yeah- I'll just smile at it." And with that, she had resolved her own problem.

Oh.... my dear- if only life were so simple. But if that wasn't the cutest thing I had ever heard.

Until a few days later, when she said this...

Asking more questions about bees and how they make honey and how the colonies "work" - she expressed much interest in the "Queen" bee. Finally, she interuppted my husband and asked,
"So, Daddy- what does she wear?"

Daddy: "What do you mean, honey? What does 'who' wear?"

Grace: "The Queen!... Does she wear a crown? A robe? What does she wear?"

Thank you, Grace- for an entirely perfect "bloggable" moment. May you read this in 20 years and laugh about how incredibly sweet and full of wonder you were.