... Unfortunately, yes. I can.
This was the
recurring thought I had going through my head from about dinner time on until about, while -until right about now, as I type this with my kids (finally) asleep in their cozy beds.
I am suffering from a nasty cold and along with it I've gotten the first ear infection I can remember having since I was a kid. Horrible! Ear splitting pain. As if that's not bad enough, I can't hear out of my right ear at all. This was starting to quite annoy me throughout the day, until I landed at the dinner table.... party of 6. And a rude, crude and down-right disgraceful group of
darling disrespectful children surrounded my table.
I found this to be especially disappointing considering that it's my favorite night of the week. "Guacamole night." This is my self-created weekly "holiday" because, well, obviously- because I love Guacamole. So, once a week, I make myself an
enormous bowl of
guac and the rest of the family eats some other Mexican concoction. It's a down-right fiesta going on. Except tonight. My holiday was ruined by my ill-mannered children.
I have no idea what was going on. Is it a full moon tonight? I'd never know since it's cloudy and rainy outside. But,
jeez! I sat there tonight in disgust as my beautiful "princess" daughter passed wind and laughed when I scolded her. I shook my head in dismay as my 3 year old son said the words, "poop nugget, fart, toot" more times than I care to remember. Now, of course you're thinking- didn't you just discipline them and stop it? Well, yes and no. I had one of those nights. I was tired. And it was my Guacamole night. And I just wanted to enjoy it. So, I shook my head harder and faster and sank my face deeper and deeper into my bowl of guacamole and thought to myself, I really wish I couldn't hear out of EITHER ear tonight. Wouldn't that be bliss? Just me, myself and my bowl of guacamole...
un-attuned to the realities of a
dysfunctional dinner table.
Ignorance can be bliss.
But I
could hear them and all of their nastiness. Even out of just one good ear that works.
Things improved
slightly after dinner. We had a great night. Went for a walk, despite the sprinkling rain. I bathed each of the children. All fresh and clean. I snuggled in and gathered them in my arms to read our evening books. It was my turn to read. And as I opened up our Bible and started reading, my precious daughter informed me that my breath smelled "like
diarrhea." Yes.
Diarrhea. Those were her words. And I was right back where I was at dinner. Wishing for 2 ears that temporarily didn't hear.
Can whomever took my sweet, darling,
loveable and POLITE children return them to me please? I don't know who these crazy strangers are.