eight.

Sometimes I wonder how it's possible that I could pick out your voice among a sea of a million - yet some days I can look across the kitchen and hardly recognize you.

I know I heard that little old lady who passed us by-  me a proud new mama, you a newborn babe swaddled in my arms - tell me that "it goes by way too fast." 

Surely, I thought- not too fast.

Surely, I thought- I'll remember every first, every last, every giggle, every tear...

Every moment.

And then the moments turned into milestones.

And the milestones into months.

And the months into years.

 

And then one day- eight years later - I thought of that little old lady and realized she must have been a grandmother.
And once a new mother.
With a newborn babe swaddled in her arms.

But I will not lose myself in a mess of tears over the moments that have passed, for those moments have weaved a beautiful tapestry of memories.

This year, especially, you have grown so much. What you've acquired in maturity, helpfulness, generosity, intelligence and loveliness-  my beautiful daughter-  is so much more than inches or feet could ever measure.

You are my helper.

My friend.

Eight years ago today - when they placed you in my arms- I thought I could never love anything or anyone more than I did right there in that very moment.

Last night as I tucked you into bed, (your long grown-up self nearly reaching from one end to the other), I told you- again- about the beautiful day you were born.
The day you made me a Mama.

And you asked me, "what did you say when I was born?"

The question brought me straight back to the hospital bed where I held you, all through the night,  snuggling you close to my chest- stroking your soft silky hair and feeling a brand new emotion I couldn't quite name, but that I knew I'd never felt before...

What did I say to you? Besides saying "I love you" - a million and one times- I also remember saying "I'm so proud of you!"

Oh, my precious Gracie girl- my first born- there has not been a day that's gone by in 8 years where I haven't thought those very same thoughts.

And if I haven't told you enough- please forgive me.
Because I want you to know today, and every single day,
how much "I love you" - and that "I'm proud of you!"

Happy Birthday, baby girl!